Some of you may wonder why I decided to post on another blog a little while back, while not writing an equally entertaining post for my own blog. Slaving away in my cubicle jail makes me wonder how I keep from going under. Stevie Wonders.

OH. I mustn't (...awkward) forget this:

With all that finally said, I, list-maker extraordinaire, ButtugMcOysty, would like nothing more than to present to you:

Five Reasons Why I Post On Another Blog

***I know I have only done this thrice in my entire life, so you may be inclined to think I'm totally full of it. To those that think that way, I think I see a brick wall in your general vicinity that you should go walk into. Let us proceed.***

1. Because I'm a helpful person.
Somewhere deep down inside of me, beneath the manly exterior, I have that quality. I really do care, evidenced by my constant sharing. And when a friend has runneth dry on ideas/topics to post on, and hasn't posted in almost a month, I am more than willing, more than able, and more than grateful to step in and put up some new and delicious blog fodder for his/her readership. Just to hold them over until said friend's next post, which, with any luck, should be inspired by my guest post.

2. To attract a newer, but not necessarily better, readership to my own blog.
This one is painfully obvious. And I mean getting hit in the nuts, TWICE, painfully obvious (go back a few posts for that video).

I see guest blogging as the equivalent of when a politician campaigns at different voter ridings, or when one of the Wayans Brothers appears on a late night talk show in an attempt to hype up another craptacular movie of theirs. Getting your name out there, passing up no attempt to shamelessly promote oneself.

Furthermore, when I post on another blog, I tend to mention my own blog. Obviously, in my own blog I will mention that I posted somewhere else, and most probably link to it. This is known as Internet Cross PollinationPromotion. You have just been business school'd.

3. Yesterday, my hit counter laughed at me.
I employ a simple web tool that tracks how many visitors have dropped by this site. And by web tool, I mean I signed up for a free service somewhere else. I don't actually have the mental capability or focus to make my own web tool.

And yesterday, being all too curious, I decided to check in on my blog statistics, only to be laughed at upon the web page loading. Embarassing, to say the least. Add this to the list of telling signs that I need more readership, and I need it fast.

I later on figured out that it was only one of those annoying ads with the smiley faces that make sounds when you mouseover them, but the damage to my blog's ego had been done, and could only be repaired by MORE READERSHIP.

4. My material (and not surprisingly my grammar and spelling) drastically improve.
When attracting new readership, one must put up a very good front. Displaying one's finest talents, just as one would put only the best of products in a store window to attract unknowing customers inside.

The new readers do not know I tend to be slightly ri-donkey-less, and I tend to ramble on amusingly, but unnecessarily (although they may have figured that out by now, I'll let them judge for themselves).

Somehow, I've received glowing reviews on all posts I have put up somewhere else. First impressions are everything it seems, and I elevate my game in the clutch. They call me Dwyane Wade. Shaq calls me Flash.

You know what. I'm just going to come right out and say it. I am Dwyane Wade. Minus the skills, the money, the championship ring, and the black.

5.