*Preface - An interesting discussion between two of my more avid comment people broke out in the comment section of this post. It doesn't particularly pertain to today's post, but I found it amusing how they were putting in harder work on my blog than I was.

Apple is once again out to attack people's self esteems. The previously endorsed message, "it is not enough to be useful, you have to look pretty at the same time".

This time around, it is not enough to be skinny, heck it is not even enough to be anorexic, you have to be as thin as the air surrounding the tip of Mount Everest.

McOysty, what does that even mean?

Well you see, class, earth's atmospheric pressure has an exponential inverse relationship with natural elevation. Meaning, the higher up you go, the less weighty, thinner (ding!), the air gets.

That unofficial science lesson was brought to you by the crack research team at Seriously Stupefying Stupidity. Our motto is, "if it's on Wikipedia, then it's got to be true, right?". The question mark in our slogan provides intrigue missing from so many other corporate slogans.

Introducing, the Macbook Air, weighing in at 3 pounds, 0.76 inches (at the max point), for a 13.3 inch display:

Frankly, it does not sit well with me that Apple would promote such sickly slimness in a culture that already idolizes size 00 stick figures. Think of all the other laptops that will read about this new Macbook, and the accompanying insecurity that is bound to creep in. The buckets of ice-cream and boxes of chocolate they will then ingest.

Think of the humiliation when a laptop's owner sets their desktop wallpaper to an image of the super sexy Macbook Air. Better order some more ice-cream and chocolate.

And then, that day finally arrives. When the laptops are cast aside for that package that arrives in one of those intra-office envelopes.

Just writing this post made me feel so bad about myself and my excess weight that I grabbed a pork chop out of the fridge and went to town on it. Without heating it up, and without using a fork and knife.

A big part of me (that was in no way a reference to my weight) is just bitter that Apple decided to come out with this product now, 6 months after I bought my laptop.

Then again, I could care less. Secretly, between you and me, getting past the uber-thin frame, the Macbook Air is