*Preface - I don't know how I'm supposed to take my medical imaging prof seriously for the rest of the term. He abused the subject-matter authority automatically attributed to a professor by a student on the very first day by conning us. AND, he's short, chubby, balding, four-eyed, and has an accent. Read on...and remember, it's accented, so it was ten times funnier in person.

Prof - Obviously, we've come a long way in the field of surgery. One time at a conference, a surgeon was telling me about this one surgery where they applied local anesthetic to the patient's arm, thinking he wouldn't feel a thing. Quite the opposite happened when they started cutting into him, and the patient started jumping up and down. The patient was such a big football player-sized fellow that they had to bring in a sledgehammer to smash him a few times to subdue him.

*a couple of gasps from the class*

Prof - I'm just kidding. They just zapped him with a more powerful anesthetic. You should've seen your faces.

*points at a student in the second row*

Prof - I mean really. Haha.