this weekend alone, i hafta make 3 choices. yes they are not the most complicated of matters, nor are they that much of an issue to me, but what would you do in my situation!?

1. Tonight (Friday) - Asian Semi-Formal is on, 12 dollars to go and dance in a packed room of asians while dressed up. all (EVERY LAST ONE) (well not adrian) have gone. of course they tried to peer pressure me into going, but anyone that knows me knows that its not my type of thing to a) dress up b) the whole "clubbing" scene
and even though that is a very good reason, i suppose i could give it a shot (it'd hafta be next year of course as this was the last one), cuz u know, u should try everything once, but that brings me to situation number two...how in the world would i wake up for

2. Chemistry Tutorial at 10am in the morning. This is almost life or death to me as one month of material has flown by me. I thought last semester's prof was terrible, but this semester...oh boy, she tries to be cooL by introducing a "molecule of the day", examples being viagra and ecstasy, but now i find out THOSE MOLECULES are on the exam as well, i guess it serves me right for not listening, but do i really need to know about the structure of viagra or ecstasy? i think i'm so screwed for this tutorial...but wait, things got compounded more with

3. Worship Practice at EIGHT am in the morning...so yeah, now you see my dilemma. On one hand i do want to go party with my friends, and it is a friday night so i should be carefree...but then where do i draw the line for irresponsibility? i know that if i had gone to asian semi, i'd be dead tired for worship practice, and then i would also be dead tired for the tutorial which i desperately need

so i drew my line where i had originally drew it...stayed at home...very nice of mel to invite me down to her apartment just to chill for a bit and watch "apples to apples" which is a fun debating game it seems...and then it was very very nice (im very thankful that God took away the hint of loneliness i was feeling...he works in such small and mysterious ways sometimes) when kwan and lincoln (guy who lives upstairs) came back cuz they decided asian semi wasnt worth the friggin 1 hour wait for a bus that never came out in the cold :)
i ended up jamming for 2 hours....and now its bed time...and yes the ppl that went to asian semi still arent back... im thinkin i made a good choice, even though i was more torn than i should've been

i'm just hopeful that ppl wont see me as some stuck up guy who wont go out of his comfort zone. i AM honestly trying... i feel like i've opened up to more ppl this year than in my whole life, and its all very overwhelming. i know i dont push myself as hard i could, and i dont necessarily take as many risks as i should, but its a growning process. i cant change overnight as much as i want to. along the same lines, im beginning to contemplate next year, as it will be my 3rd year here...what kinda role/capacity do i want to be serving the Lord (in fellowship, in church...etc) and how far will i push myself out of the box? cell group leader?worship LEADER (not just part of the team)? worship COORDINATOR? (not that i'm saying i'll get these positions, but i have been approached about the possibility of me taking on roles)

goodnight all