I realize that the only acceptable excuses for not updating my blog regularly would involve Guantanamo Bay, or my career as a hip-hop artist, or the Internet committing suicide.

My excuse, I have relatives that came all the way from Orlando (with a small stopover in Calgary, Alberta) and thought it'd be funny to surprise me at my doorstep.

My BLACK cousins.

It officially makes me 1/125th blackenese.

It doesn't have to make sense. It has to make dollars. Unfortunately, because I skipped out on the previous family reunion, I do not have very up to date photographic evidence. All the old stuff is practically glued to photo albums over which my mother would club a baby seal before letting me rip a photo from there for the purposes of proving it to my online friends. That's you.

They'll be gone soon, and not coincidentally, I'll be back here soon enough.