*Administrative Note* - I wrote this post about two YEARS ago. It was for a side project that never really got off the ground. We were young and brimming with ideas. Just wanted to let you know, in case some of the, uh, no, in case anything mentioned seems obsolete, even though I attempted to modernize the post with small touch-ups here and there.

You come home tired from work/school, fire up your desktop/laptop like you'd fire up a barbecue, hop over to your Blogger/Xanga account in a fashion that would make a little bunny rabbit proud, and prepare to completely rip into the "idiot who pissed you off today". And a lot of the times, the star of the post is a random stranger whose presence will never grace yours again. And that makes you feel better about the verbal hatred on the verge of being keyed out.

But allow me to make you squirm in your seat. What if today, YOU were that random human being who pissed someone else off? Go ahead, reminisce about all the not-so-considerate doings you pulled off today. I'll wait.

(humming the tune of Surfin' USA)

Congratulations, you're a certified jerk. Go on, give yourself a pat on the back. You know, one of those comforting, "thats okay" pats. Or if you're proud, go on and pat yourself on the back as well, and keep grinning like an idiot.

I'm not here to judge, because we're all guilty of selfish acts, such as not holding the door open for the old lady ten feet behind you, with ten dozen grocery bags hanging off her right arm, using her left hand to clutch her cane, and trying desperately to catch up to you because she knows there is no way she's getting through that door without your help. Not that I'm speaking from personal experience.

See the reality is that someone you've never met is most probably blogging about you. What comes around, goes around. Circle theory (please don't cite me yet, it hasn't been patented). Doesn't it make you slightly self-conscious? Are you running to get a towel as you sweat profusely from every part of your body, or is that just me?

I'd wager that most people don't think twice about being the subject of a blog rant. Which is odd because in an image-driven society, it should follow that people would be very concerned with their appearance.

Like looking fly at the local grocery store, because you could bump into some people you know while you're examining prospective produce. And you don't want to be the guy who was out grocery shopping by themselves.

By the way, what is wrong with going grocery shopping by yourself? And for that matter, what is wrong with going to watch a movie by yourself? Or enjoying fine dining for one? Or going outside to walk the town with only your own delightful company? (yes, my own company IS delightful thank you very much) Going on a vacation in Hans Solo fashion? Was this whole post defensively written to justify things I do/want to do? Was it? And more importantly did it work?

My own self consciousness led me to buy a magazine that promised a way to "Look 10 Years Younger -- No Surgery,", 'cause I TOTALLY wanna look like an eleven year old.