What I'm about to say may offend some of you.

To others, the following statement may baffle you.

And still others won't even read through the statement because:

a) Admittedly, sometimes I type too much, rendering certain blog posts (this one included!) skim-worthy (I'm deeply offended by this)

and/or

b) Attention Deficit "Hey, look! It's a butterfly!" Disorder

Nevertheless, you may want to prepare yourself for this one. Grab a blanket if you think it'll shield you, take a deep breath and count to ten, and whatever you do...

...don't forget to tuck your children into bed.

Internet friends should be considered equal, if not better, than real-in-the-flesh-friends.

I'm going to allow you a minute to re-read the last sentence and let off some steam however you choose to do so, before you read any further.

*twiddles thumbs*

The statement is completely bogus and I won't even attempt a comedic justification, which would've included how Internet friends usually accept you as a person even before they meet you, and how it's easier to juggle the delicate balance of time allocation to different friends on the Internet (ten simultaneous MSN chat windows are easier to pay attention to than two simultaneous in-person conversations, thank you very much message history). And mixed up in all of this is how, in a weird, twisted, way, people are more authentic on the Internet than they are in person at times. Probably something to do with the relative anonymity. And then there are the ridiculous public declarations of friendships that are conveyed clearer through the Internet. A hug, present, or encouraging comment delivered in person is usually done with some amount of privacy. Post it on a "wall" or comment box of a blog (please comment folks, please), and it's out for all to see.

For example, please direct your attention to this touching birthday tribute I previously posted, or even this:

Don't worry. You won't get it. Not because the artistic rendition of a panda is sketchy at best, but because of all the inside jokes. I am represented by the brontosaurs if you were wondering.

Public declarations of friendships that last forever (once it's on the Internet, it's on the Internet for good). This potentially vaults Internet friendship over real-life friendship no?!

And plus, in this day and age, you aren't really somebody's friend unless you've added them, and they've added you, on some social networking site or blog roll, right?!

I debated all day with me, myself, and I, before deciding against any justification of the statement.

It would've just come out sounding insane.

*Post-face ... I forget the real word ... Epilogue! - With the uprising of smaller and more focused social networking sites (Facebook was one for Uni/College students back in the day, which was when I actually had an account instead of just using my friend's account now), I think someone should create a social networking site that caters specifically to the people with the common interest of "hating social networking sites". That sounded funnier in my head.