Thursday, February 15, 2007
Rules Are Made To Be Broken, Just Like Products are Made To Be Broken When You Need Them The Most, This Has Got To Be One of the Longest TItles I've E
ver Written (blogger cut me off)
*Preface* I know I've been half-heartedly posting recently, so I come today looking to rectify that, writing up something abnormally lengthy, making you forget the ripped off feeling that overcame you as you read the last few posts.
McOysty says: Pick a number, between 1 and 100, a whole number, meaning pi, as amazing and however much I actually love pie, does not count
TheGirl says: ok.
TheGirl says: got it.
McOysty says: Uh, you're supposed to tell me the number.
TheGirl says: Haha, I thought you were going to do something else. The number was 80.
McOysty says: Ok
TheGirl says: Why? Did you want me to pick something like 47?
- Margaret Mason's, No One Cares What You Had For Lunch - 100 Ideas for Your Blog.
1. "Irregardless" is an an erroneous redundancy for regardless.
At least according to Google. According to me, using that word warrants treatment as if you were a 3 year old, maybe even throwing in a "goo-goo gah-gah" to make sure my point is being conveyed.
2. What goes up, must come down.
Put the anvil away, and trust me on this one.
3. What goes around, comes around.
The premise for not only a Justin Timberlake song, circles, and My Name Is Earl, but also a relatively popular religion!
And boomerangs. Yup.
4. When making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, always spread the peanut butter on first.
Doing it the other way leads to a tremendous amount of frustration, and usually ends up with the pieces of bread being thrown into the nearest garbage can, or at any friend laughing at you that is in throwing range.
The corollary to this rule is to never use the same knife for two different substances.
5. My name is Buttug McOysty, and I am aawesome.
6. 95% of scientists are screw-ups.
Here's the breakdown. 5% of scientists in this world actually discover what they're looking for. 90% of scientists may get close, but never get to cross that finish line. Instead they get to toast colleague after colleague for their successes while remaining empty handed. The other 5% only discover something when they screw-up (re: the discovery of penicillin).
That's why some scientist needs to get on inventing delicious McDonald French Fries that make me HEALTHIER. Either they reach that goal, or the world ends up with a cure for cancer.
7. Making up universal truths is much harder than anyone would initially think.
Especially when one has not yet had experience with most of the universe.
8. My name is Buttug McOysty, and I am awkward.
I stepped up to the area outside the elevators this morning, pushed the only available button on the ground floor (up!), stepped back, and proceeded to stare straight ahead awaiting the arrival of the elevator. Two other people came to the elevator waiting area and after about 15 excruciatingly long seconds, they simultaneously made a move to press the up arrow button that I had apparently not pressed, which was clearly evident because it glows bright red when pressed. All I could muster up was an, "Oh, haha". I stared at my feet for the ride up.
9. <-- is the square of three, and the square root of 81.
Mathematics, the universal language...
...of love.
10. The "what have you done for me lately" rule.
Take this rule to mean whatever you want it to mean, but there's a good reason I'm saving my University required 8 month job performance review 'til after I finish a big project (I'm in...month 10 right now, the University is starting to yell).
Naturally, I had to save this for the last point.
posted by Buttug McOysty
. 10:53 PM .