Inspired by a recent issue of the Golden Words, a weekly collection of satirical/off-centered random ramblings by Queen Students, I present to you, "What You Don't Know". Who knows, I may just bring this theme up from time to time. But most probably not, because it is almost 3:00AM and I will probably wake up in a few hours not even remembering I wrote this post. So ladies and gentlemen, hold onto your hats, and most importantly hold onto your children, and here we go.

You are vacuuming your filthy apartment, and while reaching into a corner, you come across a spider, its prey, and its web. Without thinking twice, or thrice, you pass that vacuum head over and in a second, everything is gone. The spider, its prey, and its web. What you don't know is that the vacuumed up spider was radioactive, and was to be the spider that was destined to bite the modern day Peter Parker and turn him into Spiderman. I now blame you for the lack of Superheros in the world.

You decide to start flapping your arms one day while day dreaming about going up in the sky lookin extra fly. All this during the 8:30AM lecture you decide to attend even though the night before, you stay up late just to write up some blog post. What you don't know is that halfway around the world, a hurricane is raging because of the Butterfly Effect*.

The seventh digit of pi is 7. What you don't know is that the seventh digit of pi cubed is also 7**.

I must let go. What you don't know is how hard it actually is for me. Keeps me up at night writing nonsensical blog posts. Keeps me well distracted during class.

You are laughing so hard at one of my jokes that milk comes out of your nose. What you don't know is that that particular volume of milk magically contained the protein/(insert biological jargon here) that cures cancer. Now it's on the floor, ever so slowly evaporating away.

Somewhere out there, terrorists have obtained control of Syntox Gas and are threatening to release it, every last gram. What you don't know is that Jack Bauer is awake and is closing in on you terrorists. So watch out. Because Jack Bauer is the new Chuck Norris. And if you see Jack Bauer, well he sees you. And if you don't see Jack Bauer, you are seconds away from a bloody interrogation (including everyone's second most favorite Jack Bauer catchphrase*** "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR") that will result in your death. Or you just need glasses.

I know I'm awesome. But what you don't know is that I'm also AAwesome. That's right, two a's. You may also not know why. Stick around, I'm sure you'll find out.

*It's not the best link in the whole wide world. But really, it does try it's best, just give it a chance okay?
**If you did know that, truly am sorry, and you need to put that calculator of yours down from time to time and go outside and play. Don't do it for me, do it for you. Really. I'm just sayin, consider it okay?
***Second only to "DAMMIT"