Readership of Stupefying Stupidity, I have a couple questions for you.

Do you like your beat down low?
Do you prefer your top let back?
Are you convinced you can make it rain?
Is your money so sick, you need to see a doctor?
Do you feel washed up like money that's laundered?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions, or even more tellingly, if you don't understand the questions, then welcome to the club that thinks that today's hip hop music is a whole lot of ignorant garbage, more specifically, just a whole bunch of words strung together usually about absolutely nothing, unless its the odd song about money, misogyny, or chicken noodle soup (with that soda on the side). Yet there's something so undeniably attractive about it. And I love it like good food.

And the president of this wonderful club, yours truly, Buttug McOysty. I'm hot cuz I'm fly. You ain't, cuz you not.

Have my standards gone the way of T.I.'s preferred beats (down low, if you didn't catch that earlier)? Possibly. But I would argue that music has always had its fair share of clowns running around like chickens with their heads cut off. Now is no different, and if you search long and hard enough, there is still good music to be found. And taste is highly subjective, although that could also be debated. Everything can be debated. I make it a point to debate any and everything. But that's neither here nor there.

I'm talking about the most ignorant songs, ones usually found in clubs (not that I'd know, but I know people that know, and they know to let me know, ya know?), that you'd probably have to read the lyrics thrice over to find out exactly what they were mumbling about. Not that most people in the clubs care anyways, I'd hazard a guess that they're not there to discuss the consequences of a faulty foreign policy.

Think about it this way. Imagine an uninspired, if not dragging, episode of The Apprentice. Teammates are bickering, Donald Trump is stating obvious business lessons such as, "Teamwork is important, I like team players, please don't look at my hair", and trying to be overly confident to cover for his comb over. One team is head and shoulders (no shampoo) above the other team. Then they cut to a Subway commercial with that jerk Jared Fogle proclaiming the dietary wonders of a Subway sub. Kill me now. All of a sudden, the glorious Alec Baldwin makes a guest appearance, instantly making the show not only watchable, but borderline likable. You stay glued to the edge of your seat for the rest of the show, hanging onto every word and action Sir Alec says or makes.

Unintentionally hilarious lines are the Alec Baldwin's of otherwise horrible rap songs. It's why I still listen to music.

*Side-note* - Only in hip-hop can you get away with a chorus/hook that consists of the artist spelling out their name, or the title of the song, or a significant word. I would really like to see John Mayer try to pull this off.

"I'm fly like an eagle, but no I'm not Donovan,
Boy you better go eat some soup with your mom and them."

Did he actually say anything? No. But he just poked fun at a soup commercial!