*Preface - Conversation occurred over MSN. Names have been changed, identities have been protected, unnecessary portions have been cut. Me = ME. Freakin' Funny Friend = FFF. And I realize that it's probably funnier to me right now at 2am than it will be when I re-read this later on today.

1:19:06 AM FFF - O M G
1:19:06 AM FFF - gah
1:19:15 AM FFF - i was about to go out to go to the washroom
1:19:20 AM FFF - and then i open the door......
1:19:26 AM ME - ... BATMAN!?
1:19:30 AM FFF - and there's 2 people in the hall
1:19:38 AM FFF - and they're totally wasted
1:19:47 AM FFF - my hall smells like alcohol
1:19:52 AM ME - s'okay
1:19:55 AM ME - alcohol
1:19:58 AM ME - smells better than weed
1:20:00 AM FFF - now i don't get to go pee before i sleep
1:20:01 AM ME - LOL WHAT
1:20:01 AM FFF - it does
1:20:03 AM FFF - but um
1:20:08 AM ME - GO TO A FURTHER WASHROOM
1:20:13 AM FFF - drunk people might ummm hurt me??

*skipping forward in time*
1:25:21 AM ME - NOTHING
1:25:22 AM ME - trumps washroom breaks
1:25:27 AM ME - except maybe war
1:25:28 AM ME - just make a run for it
1:25:30 AM FFF - honestly the people outside look scary
1:25:34 AM FFF - they're not from my floor
1:26:31 AM FFF - ewwwwwwwwwwww
1:26:34 AM FFF - they're making out
1:26:44 AM FFF - and they're like 2 m away from my door
1:26:46 AM FFF - ewwww

*skipping forward in time*
1:29:10 AM FFF - i hate this
1:29:45 AM FFF - i'm going to call my RA (residence adviser)
1:30:14 AM FFF - and he's larger than me
1:30:20 AM FFF - and he'll totally be able to kick them out
1:33:33 AM FFF - YAY i came back
1:33:27 AM FFF - safely

It took 15 minutes for her to empty out her bladder. And THAT'S why I keep message history.