Thursday, December 27, 2007

Family Vacation  

This is what happens when a light-sleeping guy like me goes on family vacation. For a middle-class family of four, it only makes economical sense to pay for one hotel room.

One family member not named me is a giant of a snorer.

I have not fallen asleep yet, nor do I foresee myself doing so anytime soon.

Thanks to the wonders of wireless internet technology, I can blog about it! Not that anyone swings by here anymore anyways!

I'm wondering if I should continue to toss and turn for the next four hours. I may be forced to eventually do so regardless of my decision, as my laptop battery only lasts for two and a half more hours.

Family vacations.

A source of such great times, but such great stress at the very same time.

Maybe tomorrow night will be better.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:47 AM .


Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Warning...Emo Ahead (But Have a Merry Christmas)  



That was funny, but the music was heart-wrenching.

Speaking of 98 Degrees, sometimes I feel like the Invisible Man, with invisible words.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:56 AM .


Thursday, December 20, 2007

Little Lols  

posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:38 PM .


Sunday, December 16, 2007

Television Talk  

*Preface - I haven't talked television in a while because television has become more of an excuse to straight chill with folks rather than being the event itself. I suppose it's for the better that way. But the upcoming holiday season tends to be accompanied by a look-back on things of the year past. For myself, it's much easier to review things that are way more fresher (that's right) in my mind, so with that said, here's some backward glances at television offerings of the year past! Allons-y!

I can sum up the past few months of television in one noun, which also doubles as a verb, triples as a tongue twister, and according to dictionary.com, quadruples as a British idiom! Seriously! The chance for confusion this word inherently possess is enough to make me chuckle!

(no pun intended)

CHUCK

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:11 PM .


Wednesday, December 12, 2007

They Don't Tell You These Things in Textbooks  

Time is short.
Time is money.

Money is definitely short (unless you're Frank Lucas).
Short is money?

If there's one thing for sure, this post sure ain't short. Buckle your safety harnesses, you're in for a wild ride...crank that Kosha Boy...

...Hanukkah's a festival we celebrate it everyday, haters get mad cuz they got one and we got eight!...

...now let's get to the business.

What You Should Actually Do Whilst In University

You know, besides all the academic learning you're paying for. I assume that because you pay for it, you probably should be doing it. But you're not going to spend every living hour doing the academics. So what should you, the scholar-to-be, be doing with all your free time? I say that hesitatingly because time is not free. Read the equations above.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:01 AM .


Saturday, December 08, 2007

This Can't Be Right, There's Only One Of Me  

*Preface - I hired trained bodyguards to protect the names embedded in this post. The guards are disguised as *'s. Don't make them angry, not only are they DYING to shoot, but they will shoot to KILL. The cleverness of that last statement warrants a moment of silence.

*moment*


Recently, a string of e-mails addressed to my e-mail address, but not to me, was delivered to my inbox. Some other A**** Y* seems to be feeding their friends faulty information. You may understand after reading the snippet pasted below:

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:59 PM .


Friday, December 07, 2007

They May Be Indestructible...  

...but Nalgene bottles may be destructing YOU from the inside-out.

This has been a public service announcement.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:10 PM .


Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Fortune-ate?  

I sat down to discover my fortune for tonight, via the opening and eating of a fortune cookie delivered alongside some takeout.

"Give yourself a day off -- at least give yourself a relaxing evening."

I was not pleased with the outcome of this fortune as I had already planned to give myself the night off (did I mention I was going to a concert that technically starts in the middle of my exam tonight? Chris, I know you're not reading this, but don't tell our parents, okay? Thanks.)

(That made no sense at all.)

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:38 PM .


Tuesday, December 04, 2007

I Get Carried Away With My Analogy  

*Preface - I'm procrastinating on my philosophy paper, which I was only working on as a cover for procrastinating on studying for Wednesday's exam. Nevertheless, for those that have been unwillingly & unwantingly(?) subjected to my football-rants of late, I apologize, and will attempt to word this football post in much more interesting terms. Seriously. You wouldn't even know I was talking about football if I didn't mention it here in my preface. But I didn't want to blindside you. So, you're welcome.

Have you ever played video-games with someone so ridiculously good looking?

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:46 AM .


Sunday, December 02, 2007

Click 'Read More' If You're Bored And Want To Read More  

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:13 PM .


Saturday, December 01, 2007

Reflection Internal  

*Preface - As opposed to reflection eternal. On a music related note, DJ Girl Talk. Have ya heard? If you haven't, you need to hook yourself up. Or bug me to hook you up. More importantly, Broken Social Scene. December 5th. I am fully aware I have an exam the night of the 5th. But if you are remotely interested, and reside in Kingston or are willing to drop by Kingston, BUG ME and let's get this show on the road!

"Sometimes it seems there are only two constants: who we are, our reality, and who we want to be, our potential. And life is the time we spend trying to bridge that gap." - T.A.N.

As John Mayer once said, everybody take a moment and acknowledge how damn deep that is. John was talking about a drum intro to a blues version of his song "Something's Missing".

It was deep.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:19 AM .


Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I Slept On This Far Too Long  

For music listeners with eclectic tastes, check this out.

Insane entry into the Beatles sample at the 1:05 mark, then it's the freakin' O.C. theme song at 1:58. A bit of Mariah Carey and Alicia Keys (amongst others) if you can catch it.

The DJ, Girl Talk, layers samples together and releases full albums. I haven't been able to stop listening to it, and it has spread contagiously like Flaze's cough to one of my housemates.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 9:58 PM .


Tuesday, November 27, 2007

WHY ARE TEAMS STILL KICKING TO DEVIN HESTER  

*Preface - I said I'd report back here with my eating habits for the past week, but it turns out, my experiment was flawed. Everytime I wanted to go eat crap, I remembered that I'd have to put that on my blog and that momentarily deterred me from buying and eating crap. But then, because of my journalistic instincts, I attempted to correct this bias and present credible results by convincing myself to eat things I'd normally eat whether or not I'd be posting about them later.

So what happened was an internal mind battle. And if you saw me standing on the sidewalk outside a chip-truck looking horribly confused and slightly pained, that's what was happening.


Let's say you have a friend, whom you have lent money to in the past, and you have observed cases of other people also lending the very same friend money in the past. 80% of the time, the money never gets returned. This friend approaches you and after an explanation of the plight they currently finds themselves in, asks you to lend them some money to get themselves out of the financial bind.

You. Don't. "Lend". That. Friend. Your. Money.

Instead, you'd probably find alternative ways, "teaching friend how to fish" etc.

Right?

Right.

Take that theory and apply that to this football player, and why you would never want to "test" him. Just kick the ball out of bounds already, please.

He's just that good.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 4:36 PM .


Sunday, November 25, 2007

Earlier today, I sent an email to myself and when I looked up in five minutes and saw my Inbox(1) count, I was really excited...

...until I realized it was my own email.

The life of a computer lab rat is so depressing.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 9:18 PM .


Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Awww...  

I know you missed me. I know you know you missed me. And I missed you missing me.

A five day break? From the same guy who had a post per day rate for the month of October? I mean, there hasn't been this big of a break since Shaun Livingston's leg. Watch the video, if you dare.

Makes you cringe don't it? It may cause you to throw up a bit of your lunch.

Which is why I'm here today.

I have decided that I am going to keep an online journal...

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:22 AM .


Thursday, November 15, 2007

Gross  

I just demolished a wrap I purchased from a local food truck vendor.

The wrap, appropriately named the SV Slider, consisted of bacon strips (none of that fake bacon-flavored-cardboard stuff they give you at McDonalds)& poutine on a...

...wait for it...

...I wonder who actually reads through these blatant stalling lines...

...WHOLE WHEAT WRAP. Because, I'm health conscious.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:42 PM .


Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Let The Rain Fall Down...  

...I'm coming clean. Word to Hilary Duff.

I have an addiction. I'm past the first stage (denial) and I'm in the stage of admittance. Steps have been taken to right this wrong, including being here to write about this wrong.

Frick (you'll understand in a second).

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 8:55 AM .


Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Now You Get To Think  

*Preface - I'm having a horrible time figuring out the equations needed to complete this programming assignment. Too many summations and terms that appear out of nowhere, but that's besides the point. Speaking of summing things up...

"A woman's life is love. A man's love is life." - Little Brother

Discuss.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:40 PM .


Monday, November 12, 2007

Dear Girl In My Philosophy Class,  

It's bewildering why you would choose to sit three rows from the front of a medium sized class and play spider solitaire throughout the 50 minute lectures.

You should probably free up the space for people that want to sit closer to the professor and contribute to the class, rather than being a complete distraction for everyone behind you who can't help but think to themselves, "Self, that girl probably shouldn't be using the 'hint' function when she's only playing spider solitaire with one suit. Can she really not see the ace and the two that are side-by-side? A turtle would probably hit random keys and win the game faster. In fact, I'm going to daydream about that right now."

Please consider a move to the back of the classroom if you insist on playing your card games. Or better yet, just stay home.

Much love,

McOysty

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:06 PM .


Friday, November 09, 2007

More Gangster Humor? But Not Really, Cuz Kanye Never Sold Drugs  

I found this to give me quite the chuckle at 2:20am in the morning, which isn't saying much because I'll wake up in a few hours and wonder where the humor was...

... but Kanye West, blogging about Hayden Panettiere (Heroes), and her stuffed animal shark?

...

Yup, it's still funny.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:20 AM .


Wednesday, November 07, 2007

That's Gangster Comedy For You  







Courtesy of jamphat.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:39 PM .


More From Computing Class  

*Preface - This marks the glorious return of Buttugly-length posts. Last month, I posted at a breathtaking pace, but I couldn't afford the time to develop thoughts. I can't promise I'll deliver a post-per-day, but enjoy this ramble. Also, Alicia Keys is set to drop soon, and so far, the tracks I've heard have sounded awesome. Not aawesome, but simply soulful. You aren't ready.

This racially motivated hate-email was sent out back in 1996, by one Richard Machado, to 59 Asians enrolled in the University of California, Irvine. Mr.Macahdo, a minority himself (Mexican), was later criminally charged for his actions.

I already posted something along racial lines a couple posts back, and while it wasn't my original intent at all, I had a feeling it was leading up to something. Here's an edited version of the email to provide context for the following small discussion:

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 9:30 PM .


Tuesday, November 06, 2007

The Things I Notice  

I had cup of butter pecan flavored coffee and a pralines and cream flavored muffin this morning.

As if ice cream invaded my breakfast.

The only thing missing was a scone.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:01 PM .


I Still Like Turtles  


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:37 AM .


Sunday, November 04, 2007

Trick-Tock  

By the time you read this, it will already have been too late.

Or too early. I don't know. The math confuses me at this time of night. Actually, I don't even know what time of night it is. Regardless...

I have a question. And you probably won't have the answer. But a few of you may attempt to think of one on the spot in my comment section below. Knock your self's out. That's right. Your self's.

There's a lot of thinking going on in this post.

Thanks to daylight savings time, if someone wanted to go back to "02:00 November 4, 2007" in a time machine, would the machine warp them to the first 02:00 (which was an hour ago), or would the machine warp them to...right now?

I timed that perfectly by the way.

So while I reach over to adjust my annoyance that greets me every morning alarm-clock, I do so hesitantly, knowing my actions could irrevocably ruin the space time continuum.

Am I the only one who thinks about these things?

posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:58 AM .


Friday, November 02, 2007

Soulja Boy Tell 'Em Kids  

I'm all for exposing kids to different aspects of cultures at various points in their education/life, but I think this is taking it too far. If you don't know what I'm talking about, just watch the cute kids do a cool dance, but if you know, then feel free to shake your head:


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 4:48 PM .


Bubble Trouble  

Bubble-gum makes my jaw tired. It's probably why I never buy bubble-gum, nor take anyone up on their gum (bubble or not) offers. I inevitably end up spitting the gum out in five minutes.

But today, I deemed five minutes worthy of the $1.36 it costs for a pack of Sour Apple Bubblicious, the only brand of bubble-gum worth anyone's time anyways. Feel free to disagree, but you'd be wrong.

So I stood there, counted out $2.36, took my $1.00 change, and walked towards the door feeling proud for unloading 7 worthless coins (6 pennies and a nickel) and for indulging myself in a sudden urge to splurge on what amounts to chewy, flavorful sugar, until I was stopped by the shrill voice of the cashier.

"Sir, your bubble-gum?"

I had almost inadvertently walked out of the store without my purchased merchandise. The scary thing is, this is not the first time I've lined up, paid for an item, and walked away without said item.

I am a modified-philanthropist by trade. I give to the poor stores.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:32 AM .


Wednesday, October 31, 2007

That's The Way The Cookie Crumbles  

That's the way...

the bee bumbles?
the ditz stumbles?
the paper crumples?
uh-huh uh-huh, I like it, uh-huh, uh-huh.
the silencer muffles?
the professor mummbles?
the play-list shuffles?
the chip ruffles?

THE CHIP RUFFLES? That's a pun and I didn't even intend it! Shouldn't there be some generic saying for a pun I accident-upon, something like...

...no pun intended.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:12 PM .


Tuesday, October 30, 2007

It's Hard To Work With Basketball On TV  

I am streaming some live NBA action from a television station in China, and boy do they have quality coverage.

For one team (Houston), their key-to-the-game is, and I quote, "Don't Lose".

Chinese people really know their basketball.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:34 PM .


I'm Frazzled For A Midterm Later on Today  

*Preface - Highly disjointed semi-rhyming thoughts while I start realizing that no amount of studying will help me learn this material I just don't understand. Read at your own discretion. This is the requisite "emo" post, which may completely shock some of you, but "emo-type" posts usually generate comments. But I don't think I went emo enough. Meh.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:13 AM .


This Should've Gone Up Friday  

*Preface - I should've made this into a weekly segment, you know, because that's what professionals do, create segments that you can fall back on in case you don't have real material, except I consider this real material; yes, you could argue that a professional would not misuse a semicolon like I just did, and yes, you could argue that a professional would not be able to write a run-on sentence without imploding, but save your arguing for the debate club; if you aren't part of a debate club, then substitute "mirror" for "debate club"; real people are made from internal conflicts; anyways, back to the point; now I'm just abusing the semicolon; after three quick thoughts, I enter into a fuller discussion centered around a painful experience...



*-------------------------------------------------------------------*


"What the hell were they thinking" - relating to software design, but led off with this:



That's pretty funny.

*-------------------------------------------------------------------*


"Opinion Conclusion" - Posed a question to the class, then took the "pro" side by flashing up this image.



Mos Def! Get it!? That's hilarious. Second week in a row this particular presenter pulled this out of her bag of tricks. Very entertaining. I'm convinced this is how you should agree with any statement.

*-------------------------------------------------------------------*


I had much more ready to be written here, but long story short, it's just really painful to watch someone self-destruct, even more so if they're standing about 10 feet from you. On a weekly basis.

Some people just need to be hugged.

Just make sure you pick the right technique.


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:38 AM .


Saturday, October 27, 2007

Life Lesson - Failure Is Always An Option  

*Preface - Sure, this guy is hip-hop aware, but this video has nothing to do with hip-hop. Watch and learn. He has also been responsible for other informed, great videos.


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:12 PM .


Thursday, October 25, 2007

Is This An Aberration?  

Or am I really going at a rate greater than one post a day for the month of October?

It's almost as if I didn't have two exams and a seminar this week, nor an exam coming up next week.

Sure, you haters would argue my posts haven't been of quality length, and while I'll try to write up something of substantial length (not promising quality), a post is a post and that's what matters the most.

That rhymes and I didn't even intend it.

I've been a little late on this one, but I encourage everyone to head over to ren-ito.blogspot.com, specifically this post, carefully read through the super long post and super long comment section, and think about things. Obviously, draw your own conclusions (don't just read and agree with everything, or one person, hmmm this kinda relates to the discussion itself), there are many perspectives being drawn on, and even more ideas being tossed around, but a lot of time/effort has been put into a discussion of this magnitude.

You kids wanted to start conversations in my commenting section, so I thought I'd show you how professionals do it.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 6:00 PM .


Jack Bauer, Please Step Aside  

Oh Em Gee!

It's Tony Freakin' Almeida!

posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:21 PM .


A Part of my Skill Set  

*Preface - This was just sent to me 2 minutes ago via email, as my seminar group is preparing for our 4pm talk today, by the female member of the group. I think we may just use this, with one of our topics being Internet dating and all. How does one accomplish any work at all after being sent hilarious images?


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:23 PM .


Alicia Keys - No One (Live on Leno)  

*Preface - The makeup around her eyes (mascara?) gives her crazy-eyes when she closes them, so watch carefully (1:20 mark). Cozy up to your computer monitor a bit. Good music is definitely in the building. Oh, did you manage to catch Bill O'Reilly there as Jay was intro-ing the segment? Good times.


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:23 AM .


Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Unjustified Outrage? May-haps  

*Preface - I started to type maybe, but decided to switch to perhaps. Inexplicable. Furthermore, you'd probably find it funny that I'm currently in the library (for real!), haven't had a bite to eat all day, and I'm basically doing myself a big disservice talking about food. Because more often than not, I epitomize my blog title. But I already said that.

The following is an ad for fried chicken, Colonel Sanders style. After the jump, watch for the supposedly-racist theme:



Please note that while it is indeed a Black family eating (delicious) fried chicken, that is not the issue at stake in this case. It is the portrayal of a Black family without a father that has been deemed racist (watch it again if you have to, but there is no father sitting around the table).

And if you think this is just a horrible stereotype (growing up father-less is soooo hip-hop), the statistics seem to be in favor of the generalization.

Also, it doesn't look like it's the first time that KFC has been in trouble with a questionably-racist ad.

Do the insulted parties have traction for their case here? Or is this completely ridiculous?

*Final Note* - We, the people of Seriously Stupefying Stupidity, do not condone the terrible mistreatment of animals generally associated with fast-food chains. If you are going to devour 150 pieces of fried chicken (for a hundred dollars, or whatever my brother kept saying), at least be inclined to know what you're eating and maybe cut back a bit mmkay thanks. *End Final Note*

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:32 PM .


Monday, October 22, 2007

For You Conspiracy Theorists  

Remember that 9/11 conspiracy video, Loose Change (no link because I think it's a waste of your time, but you can easily find it yourself)? Welps, here's a Titanic conspiracy video, aptly titled, "Unfastened Coins". Enjoy the show.


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posted by Buttug McOysty . 4:01 PM .


I Blog, Because I Am  

I epitomize my blog title.

Hecks, for a time, I even spelled a portion of my blog title wrong. Who does that?

Me.

I had a midterm today, that turned out to be worth double what I originally thought it was worth (after allotting studying time based on what I thought it was worth, and for half of that, studying with the television on and the sound muted).

*Sidenote* - Before I forget, welcome to the ... last week of Rocktober! Matt Holliday still hasn't touched home-plate! Can you feel the excitement? Will the Rockies continue to win at a magical pace? Did the Red-Sox buy their way to a championship? Will their games be snowed under in Colorado? Does anyone even know what I'm babbling about? *End Sidenote*

For the first question, I was asked to list out six words in order, which I had created an acronym for, because that's one of the best memorization techniques when it comes to making lists (apparently).

D.I.O.P - Ladies and gentlemen, DeSagana Diop, a basketball player that...
N.R. - nabs rebounds!

Simple enough right?

So imagine my delight as I go to scribble down D.I.O.P.N.R., then realize I had not properly memorized the first and last words corresponding to the acronym.

Time to break out a tub of ice cream. It's not so bad as a consolation prize.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:30 AM .


Saturday, October 20, 2007

Buttug McOysty, For Three  

*Preface - To break up the conversations occurring between people in my comment boxes, I have taken to post more often. Hopefully the disjointedness of everything will throw people off (for some, it already has).

I just did something so ridiculously cool, but at the same time, so incredibly dumb.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:33 PM .


Friday, October 19, 2007

I Need To Do That  

Say the title of this post aloud.

Now be completely honest, what you really said was, "I need tuh do that".

posted by Buttug McOysty . 10:11 AM .


xkcd, I have so much to learn from you  

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:12 AM .


Wednesday, October 17, 2007

That's Ignant Ignorant  

Don't look now, but the DNA guy, you know James Watson, could be in a little bit of trouble with the racism police.

"Black people 'less intelligent' scientist claims".

I'll discuss this at a later date.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 7:18 PM .


I Think, Therefore I Am, And You Are Not  

You know what's odd, besides the number 13?

I'm going about my bid-ness wif mah head down lo' and outta no'where, I spit lines that be da hottest fiah, but I ain't gots no beef wit nobadee. I guess I'm just a smartee yo.

*Translation* - I was casually waltzing through a regular day in my life when my beautiful mind came up with the craziest lyrics for a rap battle, even though I'm not currently involved in a verbal/physical feud. My mind stays sharp like an A student's pencils, like my breath staying fresh thanks to a package of Mentos.

It's the Fresh-maker.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 4:04 PM .


Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Post I Almost Forgot About  

Setting: Previous Thursday afternoon computer ethical, social & legal issues seminar course. It's not as boring as it sounds...

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:13 PM .


Monday, October 15, 2007

The Price Has Left The Building  

*Preface - That title just works on many different levels. You'll see.

I caught the inaugural episode of "The Price Is Right: The Drew Carey Take-Over" while waiting for my lunch to materialize.

You better go read that again. I'll finish up an episode of The Simpsons I'm watching as an act of justified procrastination (I'm spacing out the time between finishing a draft of the essay and editing because that's how us professionals do).

*Oh Homer, you is so stupid*

You see, I was waiting for a nice gentleman to make a pita for me, and his store was gracious enough to have cable television and happened to be set on the Price Is Right channel. I look away for a few minutes, and then turn around to a fresh lunch! Poof! Magic (without the Manna) materialization of lunch.

But back to the programming at hand.



One weird laugh that comes out of NOWHERE at the 37 second mark huh!?

But seriously now, here's what ought to be done to the show. Due to the downgrade of the host, the prizes should be correspondingly downgraded. I mean, sure, for the first episode, you want to bring out all the big guns. The cars, the big money, the nice vacations, whatever. I get it. I get it more than I get act-utilitarianism and it's potential to create a basis for toleration.

*Sidenote* - My own paper confuses me. This is not looking good. *End Sidenote*

After episode 1 (no phantom menace), all prize announcements should go something like this:

Rod Roddy...errr....moment of silence. May he R.I.P.

Rich Fields: Kevin, you are going to play Hi Lo for a chance to win your very own stainless steel refrigerator 1 and a half inch by one inch MAGNET!

Kevin: *punches Drew Carey in the gut and walks off*

I'd watch every episode. Wouldn't you?

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 3:15 PM .


We Live Like Educated Savages  

House-mate #1 is currently showering.
House-mate #2 really needed to poo, so he barged his way into the washroom and is currently pooing.
House-mate #1 - "This is so awkward."
House-mate #2 - "Can I flush? It's going to smell if I don't."
House-mate #1 - "AHH the water, it burns. I can't believe you ruined my relaxing shower."
House-mate #2 - "You probably should've locked the door."
House-mate #2 exits stage left.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:51 AM .


Queen's Homecoming 2007 - It Was Relatively Tame IMHO  

Have you ever walked down a dimly lit, deserted street, all by your lonesome self, carrying enough stuff to make you teeter to one side, then to the other side as you compensate?

Where it was quiet enough for you to hear Charlie Chaplin perform?

You have?

I haven't! I don't know if I should envy you! Should I? But that's neither here nor there.

This weekend, I did the complete opposite.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:47 AM .


Thursday, October 11, 2007

Probably The Cleverest Thing You'll See All Day  



Thanks to the folks at Indexed.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 7:08 PM .


On Point  

I know that when people tell me they enjoy my company, they're lying. And just how do I know this?

Come a little closer.

That's it. Just a little more.

By the way, have you been watching The Office? FYI, it's on tonight.

I hope you're close enough that the computer monitor radiation is warming your heart.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:16 AM .


Wednesday, October 10, 2007

I Lied, But When Things Happen, You Just Have To Post  

*Preface - Conversation occurred over MSN. Names have been changed, identities have been protected, unnecessary portions have been cut. Me = ME. Freakin' Funny Friend = FFF. And I realize that it's probably funnier to me right now at 2am than it will be when I re-read this later on today.

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posted by Buttug McOysty . 2:03 AM .


I'm Done After This, I Promise, Even Though It's Already A New Day  

*Preface - My titles are getting longer and less related to the posts.

Funniest thing I've read all day (I can safely say this because it's only 38 minutes in). Click to view full size, I apologize for the template limitations.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:38 AM .


Tuesday, October 09, 2007

And You Thought I Was Done  

*Preface - To be fair, so did I, until I was slapped in the face, ironically (or not) via Facebook

"haha no worries, your (not as...) frequent (...as summer) blogging makes up for it"

This, after THREE posts in one day.

I feel as if love is apportioned daily, and I get tremendously short-changed.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:02 PM .


This Makes Up For The Upcoming Lack Of Posts  

Three in a day. I'm getting really bored reading school-related articles, so I had to hop over to ESPN.

Michael Vick t-shirts have been banned at some American college.

"You can't make light of a situation like that" - media relations guy

Can't? Or shouldn't? Because, I think we're waaaay past can't.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 10:48 PM .


It's Never A Good Sign When...  

I'm reading an article from a reputable-sounding URL address, http://www.foreignaffairs.org, but the article sounds far-fetched enough that I have to constantly double-check with Wikipedia.

Uhm.

Lolz?

posted by Buttug McOysty . 7:51 PM .


Even If You Don't Like Baseball...  

I know heart-broken. And this person is heart-broken. Cue the waterworks.

All this, over a baseball team being ousted in the playoffs.

Keep in mind, she's supposed to be a professional.

I had to watch/listen to it twice, and it made me wish the Yankees lost every year in the first round of the playoffs. Listen for the build-up, or skip in about 30 seconds.



"The tears that you hear in my voice are coming down the faces of the coaches..."

Lolz.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:57 PM .


Saturday, October 06, 2007

Sensory Overload  

You know you're getting old when...

...you've moved your glasses up onto your head, in the position you put sunglasses when they aren't in use, then an hour later, almost poke your eye out thinking that the glasses would be in their normal position, and then correspondingly freak out as if you've lost the glasses.

To be fair, this happened while I was listening to some really good music, and it's unfair to think that my senses are able to multi-task like that. When one of my five senses is being maxed out, I'd like to think the other four compensate by lowering their sensitivity.

So if I ever happen to be eating dinner with you, while a live band plays in the background, while I'm reading the dessert menu in anticipation, whilst I smell the tasty mixture of smells an eatery usually offers, and you ask me to feel the texture of the tablecloth...

...call an ambulance. It'd be too much.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 10:51 AM .


Friday, October 05, 2007

I'd Be So Helpful  

*Preface - I don't know which irresponsible parents are personally escorting their kids around university campus tours on a Wednesday (school day, hello) before a long weekend, which would have been a much better time to visit a campus. Irony demands that the kids now fail school, or not obtain a high enough GPA to be admitted into the universities they visited. Nevertheless, here's how a theoretical campus tour of Queen's would have went down today.

*Preface 2 - I wrote most of this on Wednesday before I realized I had a paper & presentation to do for Thursday/Friday, so it's only coming up now. Deal with it.

Setting: Student Center, 10:00AM.

Wide-eyed prospective students and their irresponsible (see preface above) parents gather around my over-sized "follow me" flag

Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:43 AM .


Wednesday, October 03, 2007

You Could Write Your Own Punchline To This Post, It's That Easy  

Michael Vick took a 'respect for animals' class. It was 8 hours long, and he was inquisitive and attentive. At the conclusion of the course, he passed a "rigorous" written test.

First of all, how does one stay inquisitive and attentive for eight hours? I can barely be that for fifty minutes. No really! You should've seen me today! My forehead almost hit the desk in front of me! Twice! I'm sure it would've been embarrassing.

Secondly, inquisitive?

Really?



THAT is a dog. Any questions? Yes, Michael?

He was the only student in the class.

Because, usually, people don't need to take a class for common sense.

I take that back.

It's not a good look when Kevin Freakin' Federline can prove he has his act together better than you.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:24 AM .


Sunday, September 30, 2007

I Considered Eating An Apple Pie For Dinner  

I am a minimalistic eater.

While my house-mates will construct sandwiches with a layer of freshly sliced deli ham, a layer of freshly sliced deli turkey, a layer of freshly sliced deli swiss cheese, a layer of crunchy lettuce, a layer of juicy tomatoes, with a layer of mayonnaise smeared on for good measure, AND have a side dish of chips like fancy restaurants do, I eat a bowl of slightly microwaved peanut butter & rice.

Don't hate...

...conjugate.

Verbs.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:02 AM .


Thursday, September 27, 2007

Why Do Proteins Fold?  

This morning in lecture, we were asked to conduct a thought experiment, where we closed our eyes, pretended to be a protein, and asked ourselves what would cause us to fold.

*Sidenote* - Telling me to close my eyes before noon is just begging me to fall asleep. Don't tempt me like that. *End Sidenote*

If I were a protein, and somebody pushed me all in while I was holding an eight-two off-suit, I would fold faster than an origami champion.

I think I deserve a Nobel Prize.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 10:53 AM .


Tuesday, September 25, 2007

University Values  

First they discontinue the ...

... oh wait ...

First, the Fat Boys breakup...

And then, some higher ups thought it would be best to discontinue the affiliation between the Toronto Star and Queen's University. Translation? Us Queen's students no longer have access to free, daily, Toronto Star newspapers. You know, because here at University, an institution of higher learning, there's one thing we don't want to promote ...

... literacy.



You have got to be kidding me. Maybe Grey's Anatomy will update me on current events.

But probably not.

On a completely unrelated sidenote, House is better back tonight!

Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 4:24 PM .


Monday, September 24, 2007

It's Hard to be a Muslim at an Airport  

An airport in Indiana wants to install foot-washing sinks, primarily for Muslims to wash their feet before they pray.

Of course, this is causing an uproar.

And it's not what you think (mild-racism/religious persecution).

Some folks are claiming this is in direct violation of "the separation of church and state".

*whacking empty carton of Nestea against forehead*

I don't see the downside of a dedicated foot-wash station, especially in the hygienic department. And, be honest, would you really want to wash your hands in the same sink you just witnessed another person washing their feet in? Methinks not. (METHINKS is a real word. Wow.) Public bathrooms are sketchy enough to begin with. I don't want to have to worry about catching a contagious foot disease. Just put the foot-sinks in. There are much better things to argue about in this world.

Thank you.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:29 PM .


Saturday, September 22, 2007

There Needs To Be A Better Way  

It reeks of garbage here in my basement apartment that doesn't allow us to take out the garbage till Tuesday, and it isn't practical to open up the windows because of all the dust the blows being that it is a basement apartment.

I've got two fans set up in my room, both blowing air towards the doorway in hopes that the smell cannot penetrate the powerful wind blasts. I'm not quite sure about the science behind this, but so far it seems to be working.

You know, other than me being helplessly trapped in my room.

Can anybody send a fresh batch of food? And perhaps, an oxygen tank, so I have the option to venture out to the living room?

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:29 PM .


Friday, September 21, 2007

It's The Post You've All Been Waiting For  

*Preface - On this bright, shining day, some 5 years ago, Buttug McOysty first created the url "www.buttugnoraa.blogspot.com" and posted his first post. 5 years later, cha' boy is still going at it harder, better, faster and stronger. And on this fifth anniversary of things being written, people being put in place, and random facts being spewed at speeds greater than that of light,I finally come clean and explain to you...

What In The Blue Cheesed Moon Is A 'Buttug McOysty'

You know you want to know.

In fact, I know you know that you want to know.

Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:43 PM .


Welcome To A Whole New World  

I almost forgot about this. Seriously (stupefying stupidity).

You try reading philosophy books for the very first time and remain sane.

I'll throw up a more adequate introductory post explaining the new (or old, depending on your perspective) blog template sometime later.

For now, just don't hurt yourselves. Nobody is made out of cheese. Nobody is dying. No big music albums came out today.

Settle down.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:00 AM .


Thursday, September 20, 2007

Apparently, Something Is Happening in 46 Minutes  

Is it September 21st already?

Philosophy is hurting my head.

Can anyone define "zeitgeist" and use it in a sentence I can understand?

Google isn't helping.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:17 PM .


THIS, is hip-hop  

posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:11 AM .


CALM DOWN  

I haven't touched the sidebar links.

I haven't bumped people up, nor knocked them down.

September 21st. You'll see.

Who even uses my sidebar links?

I should just link everyone's links right back to here.

I'm scared of the riots that would ensue though.

By the way, I've got feelings.

Good griefs.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:48 AM .


Wednesday, September 19, 2007

September 21st  

Be ready.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:26 PM .


Monday, September 17, 2007

Dear The Females Of This World,  

I'm a guy. A guy that sometimes like to state the obvious. Previous statement notwithstanding.

Do you ever wonder why guys become so incredibly hooked onto the dumbest or simplest of video games?

It's because a guy, much like myself, feels like a failure, or completely unfulfilled, until the completion of said dumb/simple game.

So don't hassle me about a potential addiction. Don't try to distract me by walking back and forth in front of the television screen. Don't tell me I need to do my internship report that is rapidly approaching its due date. Don't explain to me the loneris tendencies being put on display. You can't tell me nothing.

*Sidenote*Kanye West - Graduation! In stores now! *End Sidenote*

You're probably better off making me dinner so I don't die of starvation whilst struggling through a dumb/simple game and forgetting to eat. I'll tell you. My memory these days. It's as scattered as the US troops in Iraq!

Thanks a bundle,

me

posted by Buttug McOysty . 5:29 PM .


Wednesday, September 12, 2007

America Needs More Maps Education  



Roffles.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:39 PM .


Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Seriously, This is S.S. (foreshadowing?)  

"A homeless woman in her early 40s is in hospital with second-degree burns after being lit on fire by two people in the city's downtown last night."

Read the full story.

"It's part of the transient lifestyle. Unfortunately that's the city we live in." - Police Office Dan Nealon.

This is highly disturbing. To think that some middle-aged folks thought to themselves, "Selves, we should fit in burning a random homeless person between our dinner time and WWE's Monday Night Raw. After-all, it is a part of my lifestyle."

SENSELESS.

New working hypothesis, people, or more specifically, the things people do, suck 95% of the time.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:13 PM .


Friday, September 07, 2007

Eight More Months of Complete & Utter Tomfoolery  

The afternoon's events culminated with a visit to Chuck E. Cheese.

Four of us, all over the age of twenty, convinced the door-person to let us in and terrorize the children by taking over their gaming machines. One of us immediately found a racing game that required no tokens because there was a flaw in the system. Two of us unsuccessfully tried to work the token machine. It wouldn't take our bent-out-of-shape five dollar bill.

The other one of us ran to corner, cowering in fear of the Chuck E. Cheese mascot attempting to give her a high-five.

Seriously. I have cell phone pictures. I just can't transfer them to the computer because my phone is stupid.

Between us, we won 16 tickets. Good enough for:



Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 9:35 PM .


Our Shower Knob Needs To Go Back To School  

It doesn't know which way is left or right!

When you turn it left, the water gets colder!

Turn it the other way, and you get burned! Literally!

I should probably label it.

Because the existing hot/cold labels are misleading.

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:52 AM .


Thursday, September 06, 2007

Things You Should For Really Know, Like, Cmon Now  

Browsing the snack section of the downtown Food Basics located slightly out of comfortable walking range (but only because the return is uphill, and you try going uphill in the winter time, it's like one step up, slip and slide back down to the bottom, try again), my shopping partner in crime exclaims, "Teddy Grahams! For a dollar!" I quickly snatched up a box and proceeded to the checkout counter.

It turns out that a dollar doesn't buy you Teddy Grahams, but something really close:


Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 12:25 AM .


Tuesday, September 04, 2007

The Things You Thought You Knew  

*Preface - I'm totally piggybacking off of someone's unsecured wireless network, and I figured what better usage would I have of "borrowed" Internet than posting! For a computer dependent nerd like me, finding an unsecured wireless network when one doesn't currently doesn't have Internet (missed modem delivery), is the equivalent of finding out the blind date your mother set you up with is actually Jenna Fischer (the friendly, girl-next-door-ish, secretary in NBC's The Office). It's fantastic.

If your mother really were to set you up on a date with Jenna Fischer (ladies, you can substitute your own male crush in the underlined space above), you may have wanted to have combed your hair that day, or have brushed your teeth, or have prepared some interesting conversation topics excluding all things related to her semi-fame.

*Sidenote* - This post is sponsored by Jim & Pam - Karen Was Cooler, But Fate Had To Rear Its Head. *End Sidenote*


Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 11:40 PM .


Monday, September 03, 2007

This Time, It's Serious  

[***Disclaimer: This. Is. Going. To. Be. Too. Long. If you don't feel up to it, go here and watch this instead. You're welcome.***]

I apologize for not being particularly funny here lately. It's not that times haven't been fun, on the contrary, the past week has contained its very fair share of fun times, so much so that I didn't even have time to troll the Internet like I usually would.

And this post will be no different. If you laugh at any point during the reading of this post, or after, during your reflecting on this post, because that's what my dedicated readership does after each and every one of my posts, you're an ogre. And not in the fairy-tale ooh-I'm-Shrek way, or a literal ogre, but ogre in the sense of the adjective.

Don't you dare laugh at my whimsical attempt to explain myself.

Whimsical. Try saying that word. It's fun.

What I'm about to do goes against two of the cardinal rules long held (one year and running) by Stupefying Stupi...err, Tell Somebody.

Kids, can you say, foreshadowing?

*foreshadowing!*

I'm not only about to name-drop a bunch of people/groups, I'm about to recount semi-specific events that have occurred over the last 16 months in my life.

... (apparently "-_____-" conveys the same sentiment as dot dot dot, I may switch over, not only because I think the ASCII representation of pursed lips is kinda cool, but also, somehow, I save money on my car insurance too)

[***Disclaimer 2: If you did not play a part in my last 16 months, but have previously starred in the movie that is McOysty's life story, or will feel offended if I don't mention you at all in this post possibly because I'll try to orient it more to the people that I know for a fact read this blog, or if you never intended to read about my life and would prefer me to go back to delivering topical posts, here's some quality reading material for you to jump to instead of getting all steamed up about piddly blog-shout-outs. No seriously, how many 2008 Republican candidates besides Giulani can you name? Maybe you should read both.***]

Read More...

posted by Buttug McOysty . 1:07 PM .